The Easy Way to RoyaltyFebruary 17, 2007
This whole Anna Nicole thing, geez, what a cast of characters. Anyone of these men (?) could well serve as the spokes-model for this blog. It’s a real conga line out there now, but my personal fave is that Prince (sic) Freddy dood. More specifically; a/k/a, Frédéric Prinz von Anhalt. Seems he was born (?) in Germany, circa 1933, I think, and is best known as the husband of the Hungarian-born American actress Zsa Zsa Gabor. Forget that stuff you see and hear on CNN or Fox, he is not Zsa Zsa’s ninth husband. Technically and legally he is her eighth. Everybody forgets Gabor’s previous marriage to Mexican actor Felipe de Alba was invalid and subsequently annulled, since she was not divorced from Michael O’Hara when she wed de Alba at sea. Details, whew. I forgive the news media here, I mean really, who could possibly remember that many marriages and who would want to? Heck, I can’t even recall what I had for breakfast this morning. Zsa Zsa said it best, “husbands are like fires, they go out when unattended.” Dah-ling!
Anyhow, before he was the Prince, Freddy was/is Hans Robert Lichtenberg, and says he grew up in a poor German family and was abused by his policeman-father and pushed to become a military officer. Over the years he worked as a bank clerk, screenwriter, sauna manager and a soccer player – a natural career progression, I think. (Private test/joke for mortgage loan officers: relate these jobs, please).
“I had a very hard childhood,” Freddy claims, recalling how he sought escape in movies and newspaper articles about Hollywood celebrities, including Zsa Zsa, then a sex symbol, now, what 90?
Freddy’s story is he got his royal title through an act of kindness in the late 1950s, when he became good buds with the son of Princess Marie Auguste of Anhalt. When her son died in a car accident, Freddy gave comfort to the Princess. Beats passing out towels at the sauna, I think.
So, with his own parents dead, he says Marie adopted him in 1980, some 30 years later, and gave him the title of Prince Frederic von Anhalt of Munich, the Duke of Saxony — or Frederic Prinz von Anhalt, as he is also known. (Easier to squeeze on his California drivers license, I guess). Now, how Marie came to “give” this title to Freddy is a real mystery to me. I mean think about it for a sec. – Germany has no monarchy. Whatever, dood, party-on.
Here’s the best. Freddy acknowledges making zillions of dollars by passing the “family title” to at least 10 other people. “If someone offers you $2 million, you do it,” Freddy says. Hey, I guess running an on-line diploma mill would be too much like work.
Anyhow, Freddy says Zsa Zsa was as gah gah by the notion of getting a “royal title” as he was about being tied to Hollywood “royalty.” The two got married in 1987 I think, and she now goes by Princess von Anhalt, the Duchess of Saxony. Gotta get these people over for cocktails.
“Everybody Is Up To Something.” sm