PARIS IN PRISONMay 23, 2007
“ANTS BEFORE ATTICA?”
According to Celebrity Tribute, just days before her required incarceration ordered by a California court judge stemming from an earlier drunken driving conviction, Paris Hilton was sighted leaving the tony Beverly Hills pet shop “ANTS,” reportedly following purchase of an Uncle Milton’s Extreme Ant Farm. Word has it that the prison “Princess” has received the “A-OK” from jail officials to cultivate the ant farm, a loophole attorneys discovered following research of the California Penal Code and Corrections Regulations. Whilst personal pets such as dogs and cats are specifically forbidden, ants, because of their indigenous nature are not excluded. The sales associate in ANTS stated Miss Hilton selected ants as her personal preference as penitentiary pals because, “I wanted something I could relate with.” Ants, as it turns out, are highly social, work at night, and generally do as they please. Ant colonies require little maintenance, but need a Queen ant in order to survive, not sold in the United States by law. An Internet forum titled, “Paris In Prison” has been established, which may offer clues to the Queen and the new Paris Hilton ant farm. Among other categories for posting, one is titled, “My Ant Farm.” No word on visiting hours for the outside army of paparazzi “non-con” ants.
Paris Hilton seen holding her Uncle Milton’s Extreme Ant Farm
antZ tunnel? heY!