“If It Doesn’t Tick,”October 6, 2007
“…GIVE IT BACK TO THE DICK!”
Above ~ the “signs” were there. O. J. Simpson dons fake Timex watch cap. Watch shown is the “Dick Tracy,” model by Fossil, which could assist Simpson solve the murder mysteries. Good. We say, keep that. Lastly, O. J. attempts to demonstrate the proper technique – for telling things.
SANTA MONICA, Calif. — O.J. Simpson is getting his fake Rolex watch back. OMG, what could possibly be next with this guy? The timepiece, ordered seized earlier this week by attorneys for Fred Goldman, has now been ordered returned to the former, “thing,” after it was determined by a jeweler to be a knockoff made in China.
Goldman has won a multimillion-dollar wrongful death judgment against Simpson, but the watch has so little value it falls under an exemption in the judgment excluding jewelry worth less than $6,075. (Great law to remember!)
Goldman lawyer David Cook said his client will comply with Friday’s order by Superior Court Judge Gerald Rosenberg.
“While we are clearly disappointed with the outcome, this tells us that collecting on this judgment, against this guy, is really tough,” Cook said.
Cook had hoped the watch might be worth as much as $22,000, but an appraisal from San Francisco jeweler Shreve & Co. concluded it was worth only about $100. Simpson had told his lawyer, Ronald Slates, he paid $125 for it.
So…not only is O. J. Simpson a Dick, he’s also a Hick, heY! A fake Rolex. Dood, how 80’s is that? And, what a dumb Dick – $125 bucks for a Chinese Rolex? Damn. Sorry, Fred, fugged again. Oh well, sounds about right for a guy who is continuing his life of crime by breaking into Vegas baby Vegas motel rooms. Yeah, what’s a Dick for anyhow? But, geez, almighty!
“EVERYBODY IS UP TO SOMETHING, heY!”
~ X Anemi